


you can change right next to me

by the_chaotic_lesbian



Series: requests [6]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Background casphardt, Black Eagles Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert, Cooking, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Black Eagles Route, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Tea Parties, Teaching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:21:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26260321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_chaotic_lesbian/pseuds/the_chaotic_lesbian
Summary: “I would like you to… counsel Ashe, if it were,” Edelgard smiles, and it’s almost fond, “befriend him. Make him feel comfortable here, in the black eagles. It is a task I would entrust no other to do as well as you could.”Ferdinand puffs up with pride. The thought of Edelgard believing him superior in even one category is enough to satisfy his overinflated ego, and he nods eagerly. “I am honored that you have chosen me! Worry not, Edelgard. I will make sure that Ashe feels right at home here, with us.”~~~~~~~~~Or, Edelgard tasks Ferdinand with befriending Ashe after the latter joins the Black Eagles. It goes better than anyone expected.
Relationships: Ferdinand von Aegir/Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert
Series: requests [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1898806
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	you can change right next to me

**Author's Note:**

> For Finch! This is one of my favorite Ferdinand rare pairs, and I definitely did NOT mean for it to be this long but I couldn't help it, I just love them so much... 
> 
> title from "grow as we go" by ben platt

“Ferdinand, I have a favor to ask of you.” 

Had the question come from any other person, Ferdinand would have surely laughed and offered his assistance, no questions asked. To help others is one of the most pleasing sensations for him, and here at the academy especially, it’s all he wants to do. It is, after all, going to be his future career as a Prime Minister. 

However, it is Edelgard herself who addresses him, a tired look in her eyes. Ferdinand had been right about to ask her if she had been sleeping well, because beating his prized rival would bear no satisfaction if she were not in a flourishing state of being. He had opened his mouth to say as much, but she had quickly beaten him to it.    
  


“You, Edelgard, have a favor for me?” He gives a proud laugh, tossing his head back. “Just say the word! I am happy to provide my assistance for anything you might need. It is my duty.” 

Edelgard releases a deep sigh, shaking her head. “Must you be so… nevermind. You are aware that we have a new student in our class?” 

“Yes, I am. Ashe Duran, the adopted son of Lord Lonato of House Gaspard.” The same Lord Lonato that their class had, very recently, executed on behalf of Lady Rhea and the Church. Something about the whole affair hadn’t settled very well in Ferdinand’s stomach. He wonders if it’s the distaste for the man, considering he had abused his noble privilege and involved the lives of countless innocent civilians. Surely that has to be it. 

“Right. Him.” Edelgard nods. “I imagine he’s quite shaken by… recent events, and he hasn’t had much time to catch his bearings since he transferred. As house leader, it is my job to make sure that all of my fellow classmates are doing well.” 

“I fail to see how this matter pertains to me.” Ferdinand tilts his head, blinking down at her. “What are you asking of me, Edelgard?” 

“I would like you to… counsel Ashe, if it were,” Edelgard smiles, and it’s almost fond, “befriend him. Make him feel comfortable here, in the black eagles. It is a task I would entrust no other to do as well as you could.” 

Ferdinand puffs up with pride. The thought of Edelgard believing him superior in even one category is enough to satisfy his overinflated ego, and he nods eagerly. “I am honored that you have chosen me! Worry not, Edelgard. I will make sure that Ashe feels right at home here, with us.” 

“I know you will.” And Edelgard turns to leave. Ferdinand doesn’t even get the chance to ask her about the dark bags under her eyes, nor does the thought even cross his mind. He’s far too excited about this. Befriend another student? The adopted son of a noble, no less? It’s a thrilling prospect. 

His first task, then, is to find him. Ferdinand had planned on spending the day tending to the horses - he’s not assigned to stable duty, but he enjoys it nonetheless, finding the task simple and a pleasant way to get his thoughts straight - but he dares not allow himself to wait much longer. He will find Ashe, and invite him to tea. That is how befriending people works, right? 

He’s not entirely sure, but he pursues it nonetheless. 

He finds Ashe in the cathedral, head in his hands. The boy looks just as troubled as Ferdinand had pictured him, after the calamity with the western church. It still hurts his heart to see, and he takes a seat next to him, folding his hands in his lap. 

“Ashe, is it?” He offers one of his bright smiles, but Ashe doesn’t even look up. “I am Ferdinand von Aegir! Though I am sure you have heard of me.” 

“Oh…” Ashe finally glances up, meeting Ferdinand’s smile with piercing green eyes and a freckled face. “Sorry about that. I didn’t see you there.” 

“It is no matter!” Ferdinand keeps his smile calm and level on his face. “Since you are our classmate now, I wanted to reach out and ask if you would like to join me for tea? I would love to get to know you better!” 

Ashe studies him for a moment, and then he smiles as well. Ferdinand is almost taken aback at the sight; it’s soft and sincere in a way that he doesn’t think he has seen anywhere else. None of his classmates have a tendency to smile, save Dorothea, and even then Dorothea’s smiles are cold and cruel. Or maybe that’s only when they’re directed at him. 

“I would like that,” he says, kindly, and Ferdinand’s heart thuds in his chest, “thank you, Ferdinand.” 

“Of course!” Ferdinand stands, and then he offers a hand to Ashe. “Please, allow me to help you up! The cathedral is no place for a tea party.” 

Ashe laughs, and he takes Ferdinand’s offered hand, yanking himself up to his feet. “So we’re going now?” 

“Well, only if you would like! I suppose I will need to secure us a table and some cakes. Oh, and you must tell me what your preferred brew is.” Ferdinand releases Ashe’s hand, albeit rather reluctantly. 

Ashe flushes a bright red, and he gives a little chuckle. “You’re… that eager, huh? I’m fine with anything, really.” He pauses, and then smiles again. “How about tomorrow after class? I’m afraid I’m rather preoccupied at the moment.” 

“That sounds lovely!” Ferdinand smiles as well. It’s rather difficult to keep that smile  _ off  _ his face in the presence of someone just as sunny as himself. It’s actually… well, rather pleasant. After spending the past few months in the presence of the other black eagles, he finds himself relishing the company. “I will have everything prepared, do not worry about a thing!” 

“Thank you, Ferdinand.” 

And sure enough, the next day, he’s prepared a secluded table for their tea party. It had taken some effort to plan such a thing when taking into consideration the amount of classes and lectures, but Ferdinand has never been the type to do things half-assed. After all, Edelgard had asked him to befriend Ashe, and he’s bitterly determined to do so at any cost. 

Even if it means risking the professor’s ire as he drops in late to class, face flushed red. He’s not the type to be late, but securing the cakes for the tea party had been more precarious than he had initially estimated.

Ashe joining them in classes had been an interesting endeavor, if only because everyone in their class of eight had already been paired off. Edelgard and Hubert sit together at the front of the class, Dorothea and Petra sit together next to them, Caspar and Linhardt sit behind Edelgard and Hubert - if only because Linhardt won’t be caught sleeping there, Ferdinand thinks with a huff - and he sits with Bernadetta in the next row. When Ashe joins them, he sits by himself, and that must be terribly lonely. 

Perhaps tomorrow, he will join him. Ferdinand smiles at the thought. 

Once class is over, Ferdinand tucks his notes away, and then turns to meet his companion. Everyone else has already departed the classroom by the time he’s finished putting his things away, except for Ashe, who is still seated at his desk, a vacant look in his grassy green eyes. 

“Are you ready, my friend?” Ferdinand asks, standing quickly so that he can offer his hand to Ashe once again. It’s the gentlemanly thing to do, he tells himself. 

“Uh,” Ashe blinks, and for a moment some emotion flickers across his face. It’s gone in seconds, and Ferdinand wonders if it was just his imagination. “Yes! I’m ready. Sorry.” He takes Ferdinand’s hand, pulling himself to his feet.

“Wonderful!” Ferdinand releases him, turning. “I believe I have secured us a wonderful spot. It is one of the things I have been trained to do, you see.” 

“I… see.” 

Ferdinand leads his friend - and they are friends by now, right? Or is he just projecting far too hard and thinking far too much? He doesn’t know. - to the table he’s procured, already decorated with cakes. The water, freshly boiled, and bags of tea sit atop the table as well, and Ferdinand preoccupies himself with checking the temperature of the water before placing the bags of Angelica into the pot. Angelica only brews for a couple of minutes, and perhaps he should be making pleasant conversation, but he doesn’t quite know what to say right now. 

Ashe has taken some of the cakes by the time Ferdinand returns his focus to his companion. The tea, now perfectly steeped, is ready for pouring, and he takes his time delicately pouring two cups, handing one to Ashe and keeping one for himself. Angelica isn’t his favorite - it’s far too medicinal for his tastes - so he carefully dips a spoon into the sugar pot, spooning sugar into his cup and gently stirring it. 

“This is wonderful, Ferdinand,” Ashe says, and he brings his own cup to his lips. His eyes widen for a moment, and then soften, crinkled with sunshine. “Angelica! It’s one of my favorites. How did you know?” 

“I… did not know,” Ferdinand blinks in surprise, “I had the brew already prepared - it is our classmate Linhardt’s favorite, and I had intended on sitting him down for tea sometime to talk about nobility - and I simply did not want to waste it. Then the tea is to your liking?” 

“It’s perfect, Ferdinand, thank you.” Ashe takes another long sip, and releases a gentle sigh. “You’ve already done so much for me.” 

“Nonsense! Why, we have barely spoken, and I fear I do not know much about you.” Ferdinand sets his own cup down, keeping his posture straight. “Please, let us get to know each other properly! It is only customary, since I have known many of my fellow classmates from a young age, but know little of you.” 

“Oh! Ah,” Ashe falters for a moment, but the smile doesn’t leave his face for very long, “well, what do you want to know?” 

“Anything!” Ferdinand gestures vaguely in his own direction before leaning in to take one of the cakes he had prepared. “I will go first, if you would like. As you know, I am the legitimate heir to House Aegir, and as such will become the Prime Minister of Adrestia. I have been trained in all arts of nobility! And I quite enjoy gathering weapons. I am quite the collector, you see.” 

“Uh… huh.” Ashe’s smile is strained now, but it’s still  _ there,  _ which is more than Ferdinand can say about several of his other tea time companions. “Okay. Well. As  _ you  _ know, I am the adopted son… was the adopted son of Lord Lonato, of House Gaspard. He took in both me and my younger siblings. I want to become a knight, and I enjoy reading and cooking in my pastimes.” 

“A knight! How exciting!” Ferdinand leans in, enthralled. He’s never met anyone with such a brazen desire; perhaps because there are no such things as knights in Adrestia. “I also enjoy reading! And I have attempted cooking before, but I am afraid my attempts… did not turn out so well.” 

“Oh no!” Ashe laughs, and his smile returns to normal. “What kind of books do you like to read?” 

A personal question? Nobody has asked Ferdinand a personal question in a very, very long time. He’s not used to such a thing. “I love reading about the strategy and weapons of armies past! Learning different techniques of fighting, about foreign strategies… it is all so very intriguing.” 

“Ah, that’s neat!” Ashe’s smile turns sheepish, and he takes another sip from his cup. “I wish I could do that more. Studying, I mean. I’ve never been the best at battle strategy. I mostly read fiction; you’d be surprised at some of the things you learn in fictional books!” 

“I could teach you!” 

The offer slips from his mouth faster than Ferdinand can think of it. He’s not entirely sure  _ why  _ he makes such an offer in the first place. Perhaps he desperately wants to cling to this friendship. Perhaps he has taken Edelgard’s order to heart already. Either way, he’s fully committed now. Whether that’s good or bad… well, time will tell. 

“Teach me?” Ashe flushes red, which only makes his freckles pop out. “About… what, strategy?” 

“Well, yes!” Ferdinand smiles as bright as he can manage, even as his brain scrambles to catch up. Thoughts pass through his head faster than he can manage them, and he almost feels as if he’s grasping for straws sometimes, keeping track of them all. “I could teach you about strategy. And anything else you might need to know! All the best for our class, do you not agree?” 

“For… for our class, right.” Ashe pauses, and then he frowns. “ I couldn’t do that for nothing though! It’s unfair to you! Perhaps there is something I could do for you in return?” 

“Nonsense! I am happy to assist you, you should know.” And he  _ is.  _ Ferdinand doesn’t think he’s clicked with someone so fast since… well, nevermind. That bridge is long burned. “But if you insist… what if you taught me how to cook? You say it is a favorite pastime of yours, and I am absolutely terrible at it. I would love to learn.” 

“Yes!” Ashe nearly jumps out of his seat, his eyes all alight with excitement, before he composes himself, settling back into his chair. “I mean… I would love that Ferdinand. It’s a deal! I teach you how to cook, and you can teach me… knightly stuff.” 

“It is a deal,” Ferdinand echoes, and he’s smiling again, despite himself. 

And what a deal it is! He goes back to his room later that night, giddy and hardly able to keep his hands still. He contemplates going for a late night ride to calm his nerves, because this will be the first friend he’s made all on his own, no political strings attached! 

And yes, he supposes that Caspar and Linhardt and Petra all have to count for something; after chasing Linhardt across the monastery grounds, they’ve developed some sort of friendship, and Caspar has proven sweet in his own way, and Petra’s intelligence is something Ferdinand almost craves, but Ashe is the first person that he approached himself and befriended on his own. It’s a nice feeling. 

In the months to pass, the time flies faster than he can blink. In between classes and training and missions, he and Ashe find their own space. Ashe, as it turns out, absolutely inept with horses despite his current mission to become a wyvern rider - not that they are the same, but you must be good with one to be good with another, correct? - and Ferdinand rushes in to correct him. 

And the cooking lessons, surprisingly, go well. The only experience Ferdinand has had in the kitchens prior to his lessons had ended disastrously, but Ashe, as it turns out, is quite the teacher. He is calm and gentle, even as he firmly pulls a burning pan out from over the flames, salvaging the meal from Ferdinand’s own ineptness. 

“I must say, I’m surprised,” Dorothea says one day, when the two are paired together for stable duty. 

Ferdinand blinks up at her. So far, Dorothea has been nothing but unpleasant to him, constantly peppering him with insults and rude remarks and commentary. He doesn’t understand. Why does she hate him as much as she does? It’s a horrible blow to his ego, his biggest idol hating him. He hates the way it makes his stomach ache and his breathing quicken. 

“Surprised? What for?” He prods, whenever minutes pass and it doesn’t seem as though she is going to elaborate on her words. 

“Well, you are spending an awful lot of time with Ashe,” Dorothea purses her lips, her eyes flashing with distaste, “don’t you know? He’s a  _ commoner. _ ” 

“I hardly see what that has to do with anything!” The words come out quick and frantic, and Ferdinand has to suck in a breath to calm himself down. “It is my duty to ensure that all of our classmates are at ease here in our class, and Ashe is no different.” 

“Really?” Dorothea actually looks taken aback for a moment, which is a nice look for her. Ferdinand wonders how much of her hatred is caused by her blindness to him due to his noble status. Honestly, she should learn how to treat others more courteously. “Somehow, I don’t quite believe you, Ferdie.” 

_ Ferdie.  _ How he longs to be referred to as such by a much more pleasant person. Not that Dorothea isn’t pleasant; in fact, even now, as she scowls at him, he yearns to erase the hatred from her mind. 

“It is the truth!” He declares, brushing the hair of one of the horses in the stable with a steady hand. “My friendship and companionship with Ashe has nothing to do with his status as a commoner. Have you spoken with him? He is one of the most pleasant people I have had the pleasure of interacting with. He believes in things so earnestly, and he is so patient with me to the likes of which I have never seen before.” 

Dorothea is staring at him now, all wide-eyed and mischievous. Ferdinand finds himself flushing underneath such a gaze. 

“Why are you staring at me?” He complains, when she doesn’t seem to move, or blink, or  _ breathe.  _

“Ferdinand,” Dorothea says, her voice a high-pitched, teasing lilt, “do you have a crush on our little Ashe?” 

“What?” Ferdinand can hardly believe his ears. “A crush? On Ashe? Me? What a ridiculous statement!” 

Dorothea just shakes her head, clicking her tongue in distaste. “I’ve never heard you sound so passionate. Not even during one of your arrogant noble spills. It would be adorable, if I didn’t hate you so much.” 

“That is… you are wrong!” And yet, the words remain with him far longer than he’d like. Far past the conversation itself, far past stable duty with Dorothea. Ferdinand has never allowed the words of others to get underneath his skin, but Dorothea’s declaration doesn’t merely settle underneath his skin. No, it etches into his brain, like a scar that just keeps aching and aching. 

A crush on Ashe. Is such a thing possible? 

Ferdinand ruminates on this as he busies himself in the kitchen one day, all by himself. It’s the 17th of the wyvern moon, which means it is Ashe’s birthday. He only knows this because the professor happened to mention it, and now he feels terrible that he did not purchase something beforehand. Birthdays are meant to be celebrated, after all! 

His cooking is… passable nowadays. Ashe’s teaching has been more than helpful, his kindness in instructing Ferdinand leaving it far easier to remember the recipes and techniques. Briefly, he wonders if it is that way with everyone; if every person responds better and learns easier when taught with kindness. He files this away to think about later, once the role of Prime Minister has been thankfully passed down to him and he can actually  _ do  _ something about it. 

Cooking, it would seem, helps him think. And Ferdinand thinks. He kneads dough with his hands, the motion soothing and pleasantly repetitive as his mind whirs. 

Does he have a crush? It’s a ridiculous thought at first, but the longer he thinks on it, the more he wonders if it isn’t the truth. After all, here he is, baking pastries for Ashe’s birthday, when… had he celebrated the other birthdays of his classmates? Hadn’t Caspar’s passed not long ago? Isn’t Linhardt’s coming up? 

Would he bake pastries for them as well, or is this a privilege reserved only for Ashe?

By the time he’s finished baking, he has not come to a concise conclusion. How disappointing. 

Nor does he come to a conclusion at all during their time in the academy. 

Oh, he thinks about it. He thinks about it rather hard. He wonders what it would be like to take Ashe by the hand and lead him around the private gardens on the Aegir estate. What kind of insight his friend would give him on the affairs of the state. Ferdinand has never desired company before, but now he yearns for it. 

But then Edelgard declares war. 

And everything changes. 

~~~ 

It’s hard to believe that five years have passed, Ashe muses. 

He doesn’t really know how to feel. Joining the black eagles all those years ago… well, it had been the best decision for him at the time. He had heard about how they had gone to deal with his adoptive father, how none of them had wanted to kill him but Catherine had done it anyways.  _ Like father like son,  _ Ashe had thought at the time, darkly, and then rushed to the cathedral in shame. He’s not used to feeling so… so horrible towards another person. He thinks Catherine deserves his ire, but that’s not his call to make. 

He definitely had not expected that something as simple as transferring classes would lead to him transferring his allegiances as well. But… 

He thinks about how Dimitri had immediately sided with the church. The same church that murdered innocent people. That had both Christophe and Lonato killed. There was no way he could side with them, with  _ her.  _ So he had left. 

And now he is… here. A black eagle. Part of the black eagle strike force, no less, because he had been their classmate for so long, he had earned all of their trust already. He was one of them. And doesn’t that feel nice? After spending an entire lifetime hopping from one place to another, losing one home and then the next, it’s… nice to have a home he can call his own. Friends, family. 

“Ashe, buddy, you good?” Caspar asks, scooping food into his mouth without a second thought. His words come out slurred and muffled because of that. Ashe actually finds it comforting. After all those years, at least Caspar has never changed. 

“I’m okay,” he answers, picking at his food. He’s found that his appetite has waned during wartime. The food isn’t quite the same, and he knows it’s for a lack of fresh ingredients, but he yearns to be able to cook up a good meal for people. 

It’s a shame his cooking lessons with Ferdinand have ended, he muses. This would be the most perfect time to teach the man how to cook with less than stellar ingredients. 

“You look all stuffy. The same way Lin does whenever he’s thinking too hard.” Caspar nudges his shoulder; it’s meant to be friendly, but this Caspar has not learned of his newfound strength, and the force of the shove nearly sends Ashe toppling. 

“I guess I was just lost in thought. About… all of this,” Ashe steadies himself, and then gestures vaguely towards the cafeteria, “war. I can’t believe you guys accepted me into your ranks so easily. I mean, I’m from Faerghus.” 

“Well yeah, but you’re one of us!” Caspar claps him on the back, and it is, once again, far too strong. Ashe winces. “You always have been, you know. Has anyone been picking on you for being from Faerghus? I’ll beat them up!” 

Ashe laughs. Yes, Caspar has not changed, aside from his strength. 

“No, nobody has given me a hard time,” he says, meekly, picking at his food again. “I suppose I feel… lonely. The only friend I really had before the war was Ferdinand, but he’s hardly spoken to me since this began. I know he’s busy playing minister, but…” 

He trails off. 

Ferdinand’s presence - or lack thereof - has definitely been a contributing factor to his newfound loneliness. After all, before the war, they had spent nearly all of their free time together, either in cooking lessons or horseback rides or tea parties. 

He remembers the fond smile Ferdinand had given him whenever Ashe had shown up at the monastery for the class reunion, bags in hand. The warmth in his eyes. It’s almost a shame that he hasn’t seen it since. 

“Aren’t you friends with Petra?” Caspar asks, and he’s actually set his food aside, staring at Ashe with a burning intensity. Ashe has never been on the receiving end of one of the looks, and he shivers. Is this how Linhardt feels all the time? 

“Yes but… well, it’s just not the same.” His budding friendship with Petra had only begun in earnest after the class reunion, and even now he doesn’t know if she appreciates his company in the same way that Caspar does, that Ferdinand had. 

“It’s not the same…” Caspar frowns, and then his eyes brighten. “You know, that’s just how I felt whenever the war separated Linny and I.” 

“What?” 

“Yeah! It was like… I had other friends that I got to see and such, but it wasn’t the same. And I thought it was weird that I didn’t feel the same way, because Lin was just a friend, right? But then!” He grins, cheeks flushing red, “when we spoke for the first time in so long, he just… he just leaned over and kissed me, and I realized that was why things felt so different!” 

“Yes, yes, you two are happily in love, I get it,” Ashe sighs, “I don’t understand how this relates to me, though. No offense, Caspar, but you aren’t really good at giving advice.” 

Caspar scowls, but he doesn’t try to refute the statement. “You want advice? You should challenge Ferdinand to a duel! Since you miss him so bad.” 

“Why would I… no!” Ashe shakes his head, but his declaration does turn some wheels in his head. “What I should do… what I should do is confront him and force him to talk to me!” 

“That’s the spirit!” Caspar cheers. 

If only it were that easy. 

Since the reunion, Ferdinand would spend most of his days locked up in one of the old faculty offices doing whatever work is needed for the day, shouldering most of the political burden for Edelgard and Hubert. If he wasn’t there, he was training - though Ashe had heard that he mostly spent his time training in the dead of night - or out on horseback rides. The combination of an eclectic schedule, and cornering him was less than pleasant. 

It takes Ashe a full month to successfully pin Ferdinand down. 

He has to hang around the offices at the strangest of times. Thankfully, he had overheard Hubert mention that he was going to force Ferdinand to go to bed soon, which had clued Ashe in that he should go up and wait. 

It’s a strategy that  _ works,  _ because the threat of Hubert coming into his office is enough to send Ferdinand bustling out of it only moments later, just in time for Ashe to call his name. 

“Ferdinand!” 

Ferdinand turns, and for a second there’s an almost pained look on his face before it steels into calm patience. “Ah, hello Ashe,” he greets, his tone completely neutral, “is something the matter?” 

“What are you working on?” Ashe squints at the stack of papers tucked under Ferdinand’s elbow.  _ As if he’s going to his room to work some more,  _ he thinks with a scowl. “You aren’t still working, are you? I was going to ask you to tea.” 

Ferdinand von Aegir - at least, the Ferdinand von Aegir that Ashe knew in their schooldays, one who was more arrogant but also brighter, more cheery - would never pass up the opportunity to take tea with someone. And, like clockwork, the neutral face Ferdinand makes fades into a resigned sigh, and he dips his head in a nod. “I would love to.” 

“Great!” Ashe smiles, and then winces. “I don’t think I got anything prepared, though. I’m not nearly as good at this as you are.” 

“Nonsense,” and finally, a hint of the old Ferdinand shines through, in his dedication to ensuring that Ashe - or anybody else, for that matter - speaks ill of himself, “I have taught you well. I can imagine that you were, ah, hard-pressed to track me down. Am I correct?” 

Ashe, despite himself, laughs. “You are,” he affirms, and he gives a gentle smile. “No matter, I still have one of the old tea sets you gifted me in our school days. If you’d like, you can put your work down and I will get things ready.” 

“I should not…” Ferdinand falters at the sharp look Ashe gives him. He has worked far too hard to find Ferdinand and ask him to tea to give up due to a lack of preparations. “Alright,” he relents, with one of his small smiles, the ones that do not reach his eyes, “I will meet you at the gardens. Same spot as always?” 

And for a moment, Ashe feels… relief. Relief that Ferdinand remembers their old spot. Relief that he has accepted the date. Relief that there’s a chance to salvage whatever it was that was lost in the years that stretch between the academy and now. 

“Same spot as always,” he nods, smiling. “I’ll see you there! Don’t take too long!” 

He dashes off before Ferdinand can reply to scuttle downstairs, back to his old dorm room. He has several elegant tea sets decorating the shelves once used for books; the room had felt empty without anything on them, and what better than the delicate china? He is grateful for his own decision moreso now, as he gently picks out a kettle, a warmer, two saucers, and two cups. 

He carries them precariously back to the gardens, where he has beaten Ferdinand. All the better, it gives him ample time to dash to the dining hall and pick out a blend of tea - southern fruit blend, the same scent that haunts him through the dreams that he can’t remember - and a pitcher of water. He pauses, and then snags a plate of sweet buns as well; it won’t replace the cakes Ferdinand had always taken care to prepare, but at least it is  _ something.  _

By the time he arrives back at their table, Ferdinand is there, standing awkwardly at one of the chairs. His eyes light up whenever he sees Ashe, though, and he quickly pulls out the chair he had been hovering around, gesturing towards it. 

Oh. He’s trying to be chivalrous. Ashe blinks, and then smiles. 

“Hello Ashe,” Ferdinand greets, as Ashe takes a seat in the proffered chair. “Well, I suppose I have already greeted you today, have I not? You will have to forgive me, my mind has been in a state of turmoil for quite some time.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Ashe says, pouring water into the teapot, and then gently setting the pot onto the burner and lighting it. He’s not as good at this as Ferdinand is, and his cheeks heat up at the thought of his dear friend judging him poorly for his lack of education. “Although I am curious as to what you have been up to. I feel like I haven’t seen you at all.” 

“Ah yes. Forgive me.” 

“You don’t need to ask for my forgiveness.” Ashe drops his tone, keeping it soft and gentle, “honestly Ferdinand. Is something the matter? You are acting… strange.” 

“Nothing is the matter!” Ferdinand exclaims, and then the pot begins to whistle, which means the water is ready and also gives Ferdinand an out to the conversation. Ashe sighs, and he sets the teabags into the cups before he pours the steaming water into the cups. He doesn’t take care to check the temperature, mostly because he forgot a thermometer. Just another way he’s screwed things up. 

“Here you are,” Ashe says, quietly, after minutes have passed in silence. The tea is properly stewed now, so he takes the bags out, passing a cup to Ferdinand. 

“Thank you,” Ferdinand takes the cup, and he inhales the scent with a pleased sigh, “southern fruit blend! You remembered my favorite?” 

“Of course I did. I’m not the one who has forgotten our friendship.” Ashe is wincing before the words even come out. He did not mean to sound so… rude, so bitter and disgruntled. Heavens help him, for a moment he sounds like  _ Felix.  _

Ferdinand, too, winces, and he sets his cup down, eyes wide. “I have not forgotten our friendship!” 

“You don’t speak to me. Our lessons have paused indefinitely. I had to hunt you down to invite you.” Ashe frowns, deeply. “I know that… that originally, you befriended me on Edelgard’s behalf.” 

Ferdinand winces again. “She told you?” 

“She didn’t want any pretenses between us.” Ashe sighs. “I… I’m not mad at you. You were just following orders. But… you could’ve told me at least.”  _ So that I would know that you were pretending. That this friendship was false.  _

“But you are wrong!” Ferdinand nearly leaps out of his seat, his voice raising in panic, reaching higher and higher. “Maybe this… this started on Edelgard’s behalf, but it did not continue that way! I swear on my name, I was never false with you.” 

He fidgets anxiously, and then pulls a document out of his coat. It looks… official, moreso than anything Ashe has seen before. “Not seeing you since your arrival was a mistake on my part, I will admit. I was just… well, nevermind. Nothing that I could say now would ease the hurt that you surely must be feeling. I sincerely apologize.” 

“It… It’s okay, Ferdinand, really.” Ashe leans forward, studying the document. It’s fancy and artfully worded, to the point that although he reads the words, not much of it sticks in his head. “What’s this?” 

“This is what I have been working on!” Ferdinand finally smiles that blinding smile of his, lighting up his eyes. “This is an official edict for whenever I am the Prime Minister of Fodlan officially. Underneath the edict, all villages will be required to host a school of sorts; a place where children of any status can go to receive education and food, for free. The village would receive monetary compensation to cover the expenses.”

“That…” Ashe’s eyes widen at the thought. Free education and a free meal? For children no matter the status? He would’ve  _ killed  _ for that. Has killed for it, if his service in the war counts. It’s a daunting thought, but if anyone could change things so drastically, it would be Ferdinand. 

“I did not want to rest until I had perfected the edict,” Ferdinand says, softly, that bright smile still on his face. “I know of your hardships in life, and I do not believe any child in all of Fodlan should have to suffer the same fate. This… this is for you, Ashe.” 

“For me?” Ashe swallows. “You must be joking.” 

“I am entirely sincere!” Ferdinand reaches across the table to take Ashe’s hands, squeezing them gently. “This… this is the part where I tell you of how I feel, but I will admit, I did not come prepared. I would have liked to purchase something for you, or perhaps receive my family heirloom ring.” 

“Wait.” Ashe takes a deep breath, swallows. “Ferdinand… are you… in love with me?” 

There’s a pause. 

“Yes. I believe I am.” Ferdinand blinks, and that smile falls off his face, replaced with something more pensive. “You have shown me what it is to truly be a noble. Among other things. And I have always admired you. As I said earlier, that was no lie. I was not sure entirely until I saw you join our army at the reunion, and then once I did… well, I wanted my confession to be perfect.” He laughs, though it is strained and hoarse. “And yet I did not consider your feelings in the process. I apologize, Ashe. We can forget all of this if you would like.” 

Ashe thinks. 

He thinks of the time when he’d been alone, freshly orphaned for the second time, switching to a new class without any friends. He thinks of the hand outstretched to him in that cathedral, held out by a man with a sunny disposition. One that didn’t judge him for spending all his time in the cathedral, torn between contemplating murder and outright sobbing. One that had just wanted to get to know  _ him,  _ the real Ashe. 

“I don’t want to forget,” he says, and he offers a smile. “I… I also love you.” 

“You do?” And Ferdinand releases his hands, eyes wide with surprise. “I mean… oh Ashe, you have no idea how pleased I am. I might faint.” 

“You’re sitting down!” It’s so ridiculous he can’t help but laugh, his hand flying up to cover his mouth. “If you want to give your perfect confession, I won’t stop you. I don’t need any fancy gifts you know. Just your presence is enough. And maybe we could continue our lessons later?” 

“Just my…” Ferdinand falters for a moment, something flickering in his eyes. Ashe wonders if he is the first person to say that of Ferdinand. Wanting him not for what he could get out of it. He composes himself too quickly to tell, and his eyes water. “Very well. Ashe, I am wholly, deeply in love with you. Will you do me the honors of being my boyfriend?” 

And Ashe smiles. 

“Yes.” 


End file.
